Muditā is often translated into English as either Sympathetic or Appreciative Joy. One of my favourite Buddhist teachers and academics, Gil Fronsdal, suggests that the word ‘Rejoice’ captures more of the essence and energy of Muditā. I think it’s certainly another nice way to think about it.
Intention Beyond Selectivity
I live in South Cornwall, about a 5-minute drive to the closest beach. One of the things I really love doing is watching people enjoy the sea. There is something so heartwarming about seeing others gazing peacefully at the ocean, screaming with delight when getting into the cold water, or playing beach bocce. I feel real Sympathetic Joy seeing others relaxed and at ease, enjoying the ocean.
It’s a very joyful thing to see and experience the joy of other people while it’s happening. This appreciation is closely related to the fact that I’m being mindful and aware, instead of being on autopilot or self-preoccupied, and just mindlessly walking by. Sympathetic Joy requires intention beyond selectivity, helping us stay open and take in the experience in the moment, as it’s happening.
When we spend a little bit of time focusing on seeing and being grateful, appreciative, and delighted by the things that are happening, we begin to live life beyond life. Like any energy, joy is contagious, too. It’s beautiful to gain the ability to stay open and share the happiness of others.
However, it’s worth mentioning that we are not just romantically bypassing. We are not trying to create a new bias but instead cultivating a sense of openness and expansion, rather than being consumed with our fantasies, memories, and predictions about the future. By being present, we appreciate more.
Hindrances
The other day, my husband and I looked into the difference between envy and jealousy. After a quick read, we learned that envy is the desire for something another person has, while jealousy is the fear of losing something you already possess to someone else. For instance, envy may arise when we see a friend’s success, while jealousy may surface if we fear losing our partner’s affection to someone else.
I think for some people, acknowledging the success or wellbeing of others is closely connected to feelings of competition and comparison. It’s like celebrating others implies a lack of our own success and perhaps highlights how stuck or insignificant we feel. These perceptions really stand in the way of embracing appreciation and gladness for others. They keep our hearts closed and limit our capacity for joy. So what can we do about this?
Practicing Muditā
Practicing Muditā helps dissolve and soften feelings of jealousy, envy, and discontent that may be rooted in the success and well-being of others.
We practice with Muditā by using it as a reference point to notice anything that stops our hearts from being open and honest. By doing so, we discover the reasons for our discontentment. Is it because we think we are better than others? Or perhaps we think of ourselves as less than someone else? What hindrance is present? Can we stay present to that experience? Can we hold it in the soft palm of our awareness and witness it without reactivity? With compassion?
One way to start practicing Muditā is to appreciate and understand what gets in the way and what makes it more complicated. In doing so, we make this real. It’s impossible to bypass it.
Another way is to acknowledge and reflect on daily moments and glimpses of gratitude and contentment. When we cultivate gratitude for ourselves, we can gradually begin to expand it to include others. This is perhaps why gratitude journals and the gratitude alphabet became so popular in the last ten years. I don’t journal myself, but I like to reflect on my sitting practice at the end of the day, considering what really brought me joy. It would be a lie to say this is always easy. On those days, we can focus on little things: a cup of tea, a dog coming to sniff your hand, a blue sky. I believe there is always something we can appreciate each day.
When we cultivate Loving-kindness for ourselves, we are not being self-centered, selfish, or self-focused. We are preparing ourselves to express loving-kindness toward the world around us. Acknowledging appreciation and contentment in our lives is a form of gratitude.
Just as we explored Compassion and stayed open to our own and others’ suffering, this same ability helps us remain open to experiencing joy. The Brahmavihāras lie at the very heart of Buddhist practice, helping us engage with the Dharma in a somatic, embodied way.
Practicing Muditā brings us only benefits, with no drawbacks or losses.
